


Stupid Potter

by Peter164



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Drag Queens, Homophobia, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-04-03 03:29:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4084993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peter164/pseuds/Peter164
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stupid Potter with his glasses, and his fancy cars. He's got everyone fawning over him, like he's so great. It's not like he has perfect eyes, or his hair sticks up in just the right places, or he's so perfectly thin and still full of muscle. Maybe he's a little perfect, but only a little. </p><p>In which Draco Malfoy doesn't notice his massive crush on his awkward, yet lovely classmate, Harry Potter until it's gone too far.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First and Foremost

**Author's Note:**

> AU in which there's no magic and Tom Riddle is Voldemort's son, not the same person.

I couldn't help but notice how cute he looked in 1st year. His pleasantly round face, and bright eyes. How could you not think he was cute. And he had that adorable little voice. I immediately wanted to have him close, but of course he turned me away, why wouldn't he? He thinks that just because he survived, that makes him so special. Well he's wrong. 

Harry Potter, the boy who lived. He's the only one to make it out of You-Know-Who's hands alive. He killed James and Lily, and just before he could get to pretty little Harry, he was arrested and sent to the highest security prison possible.

Of course he got on the school football team when he was 11. I went to his first match because he was playing my team, so I was obviously going to root against him. I remember Pansy telling me how much she liked him. 

"He's so puny. You only like him because he shouldn't be alive." I snapped at her. 

"Come on Draco, even you can admit that he's the cutest on the team." She told me. I hated her, so naturally she became my best friend. 

~*~

Next came 2nd year, when the janitor's cat had a health scare and he thought Harry poisoned her. Also we had a huge flood in the bathroom that took a week to clean and his entire dorm had to sleep in the cafeteria. 

He also got rid of our servant, Dobby. Father was never good to him, but I used him for advice. He didn't really leave the house much so, I got to tell him all about that idiot of a boy that went to my school. It was our secret, father couldn't know that I talked about Harry so much, he might think I liked him. 

"Do you think you might have a crush on him?" Dobby asked with his squeaky voice, "I know you keep saying you hate him, but you don't sound like you hate him."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I turned my back and stuck my nose up. 

"Then I'm afraid I can't help. Your father is calling for me, I'll be back in a moment if you wish." He was so tiny, it was almost unnatural. 

"You don't have to. Go sit the garden or something." I shrugged him off, even if I really wanted him to stay. 

~*~

After that Harry's godfather showed up, he was working for You-Know-Who before he murdered his best friend and was arrested. That was also when a girl asked me to go out with her, and I realised I didn't really like her, or girls in general. 

In fact there was a 4th year that I wouldn't mind getting pulled into a closet by, Tom I think. It was scary to think I might be different. Father doesn't like different. What was I going to do if I ended up being gay? That wasn't allowed to happen, unless I actually did get pulled into a closet by the beautiful Tom Riddle. 

Harry's best friend punched me in the nose, and I saw Headmaster walking in the hall behind her and he just nodded like he was impressed. Am I really so awful? Probably. 

~*~

This was the year Harry got picked for the Tournament. He's not old enough to even enter, and one of our Professors called me ferret all year and almost got in trouble with McGonagal for insulting and degrading students. It went as far as getting a ferret in my bed before he had to have a disscusion with Dumbledore. 

I came out of the closet this year too, I wrote my parents a letter and got a very angry phone call from my dad back. 

"DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY, YOU ARE A DISGUSTING HUMAN BEING AND A DISGRACE TO YOUR FAMILY! I STILL HAVE NO IDEA WHY I'M LETTING YOU COME BACK HOME AT ALL! I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER ALLOWED TO VISIT FOR HOLIDAYS. YOU SHOULD FEEL GREATFUL YOU FILTHY CHILD, NEVER EVER MENTION YOUR DISEASE TO ME AGAIN!"

When someone asked me what happened, I told them the truth. I didn't even flinch when father called me names. Within an hour the entire school knew about it. The next day mother sent me a letter and a box of chocolate. 

_Hello darling,_  
_Lucius is very angry at you and I apologise. There's nothing wrong with you, and I hope you know that. If you need a hotel to stay at during Holiday vacations then I will gladly stay with you. Feel free to call or write to me anytime you like, except Tuesdays before 4:00. I have work then._  
_I love you,_  
_Mum_

I love her so much. 4th year was big for me. That's when Tom asked me on a date with him. He took me to a little coffee shop, where we talked about stupid things. He reminded me so much of Harry. It was weird. 

~*~

It's 5th year now. I have a boyfriend. Mum sends me letters once a week, mostly just checking up on me, along with a monthly package of extra money and sweets. I'm so happy that this horrible teacher we have only made the rule that boys and girls are not allowed to be within 8 inches of each other. 

Well guess what bitch, I'm gay and I will gladly snog my boyfriend in the middle of the hallway just to make her scream. Lost my virginity this year too. I couldn't help but notice how close Harry was getting to Cho Chang. She dated Cedric Diggory for a while, but since he was killed last year, she's been really depressed. I hope he's dealing with her now. 

I dressed in drag for the first time, and I actually enjoyed it. I wasn't really expecting to, but it was the strangest confidence booster I've ever had. Since then I've just walked down the street like that. I'm a definite fish, so no one even looks twice at me. It's fun, and surprisingly enjoyable. I wonder what my parents would say. Dad would probably gasp and yell at me again, maybe kick me out. Mum would smile, give me makeup tips, and take me shopping. 

Luckily we still have more than half the year left, I can wait.


	2. Perfect Tom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not as good as I wanted it to be. My other chapters will be better written I promise.

I never dressed in drag at school, as much as I wanted to. I swung my leg over the bench next to Tom. He raised an eyebrow and smiled at me. He handed me a muffin. It was a Friday and I couldn't wait to pull on a skirt and drown myself in makeup. 

I didn't have any classes with him sadly, I had a few with Potter, but that wasn't really better.

"So, what do you have this quarter?" Tom asked me. Every quarter of the school year we switch elective classes. 

"Aside from core classes, I have Psychology and Zoology." I told him. He was a year ahead of me and in career preparation (Or CP as we call it.) He told me he wanted to go into law enforcement. Maybe because his dad was the labeled the most dangerous criminal in England. Rated higher than Jack the Ripper, seriously, "How're your classes going?" 

"I think it's going pretty well, but I have no idea what I'm doing ever." He laughed a little and took a bite of his waffle. 

"Come on, you're at least second best in the school. The only person I can think of who could beat you would be that Granger girl." I reassured him. 

"I was going to be offended, but then you brought her up." He kissed my shoulder and placed his head in the same place. 

"Hi." I looked down at him, "Having fun?" 

"Very much actually." He muttered, "Can you go get me some more juice?" 

"What's the magic word?" I asked him. 

"Can you get me some more juice, please?" He looked at me with big doe eyes. 

"Actually, the magic word was duck, but that's adorable so I'll do it anyway." I grabbed his glass and went to get him juice. When I sat back down he cheered childishly and kissed my cheek. I looked over to the other table and saw Harry laughing with his friends. 

"Are you trying to make me jealous again, Malfoy?" Tom had his arms around my waist. 

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I really didn't. 

"You're looking at Potter again." He whined, "You pay more attention to him than you do to me."

"You know what they say," I was still distracted, "Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer."

"And keep your boyfriend closest of all because he could be your future husband." He flicked my nose with his thumb. 

"Is that your idea of a proposal?" I sat so the bench was between my legs and I was facing him. 

"Maybe." He smiled at me and pecked my lips. 

"Well ask again in a few years," I kissed him back, "I'm only 15." 

"Is that your way of telling me the only thing in the way of a yes is 3 years?" He had his hands on my cheeks. 

"Maybe." I grinned at him and pulled on his shirt to get him closer. 

~*~

I sat in science class, bored out of my mind. I was really good and Snape loved me. He called out the new seating chart, and he put Potter and me next to each other. I couldn't stand it, he always got lost in thought and forgot about what we were doing. Just today, we were making a battery and he forgot to pay attention, when I snapped him out of it he just blinked. 

"I was just thinking about what it would be like if I was a wizard." He told me, "This would be our Potions class and instead of batteries we could be making an energizer potion."

"That's ridiculous," I snapped, "You can have your impossible dreams later. Get your head out of the clouds and focus." 

"Sorry. I'll try to do better." He snapped up, straight backed, eyes to the floor. He looked stiff, like he was carved out of wood. It took a minute, but he shook himself out of it and continued working, still stiff and jerky. 

"Are you okay?" I asked, this didn't seem normal by any standards. 

"I'm fine." His face had lost all expression. 

"You sure?" I was starting to get concerned. 

"Yes." He nodded, "Let's keep working." He swallowed and pointed to the supplies. I wondered if I should let someone know, but he could just be having an off day. I'll wait and see. 

"Okay." I let it slide, hesitantly. 

~*~

I was back in the dorms with Tom. I told him about Harry, he told me not to worry about him, he's not my problem.

I did a bit of homework after my classes and went to go get a snack before I went out. I ran into the one and only golden boy. 

"Draco. Hi." He smiled, back to his usual daydreamy self. Like his little episode hadn't ever happened. 

"What?" I admit that came out a little colder than I wanted it to. 

"I want to apologize for earlier." He was so tiny, and that was oddly attractive. I usually went for men bigger than me, not this puny little thing, "I don't know what happened. It probably seemed a little weird."

"Weird?" I crossed my arms, "Spacing off thinking about magic is weird. Turning into a robot is creepy and concerning."

"When people snap at me like that, anyone, not just you," He made sure to clarify, "I shut down and go into a sort of autopilot mode. I'm okay otherwise."

"Don't get carried away, I won't scold you, deal?" I stuck out my hand. 

"Deal." He shook my hand and we walked out separate ways. I went to eat something. I needed some food in my system to dress up and spend the day with my boyfriend. 

~*~

I loved being a girl. It was fantastic. I couldn't help but smile as I walked down the street with Tom. He had seemed distant this year. I think it was the extra stress of CP. He took me to Honeydukes, the old fashioned candy shop, and bought me a lollipop. 

I'm happy he doesn't care if I wear short skirts to go on dates with him. I noticed Harry with his two friends walking into the smaller, lesser know Pub. 

"What do you think they're doing?" I asked Tom. 

"Who cares?" Tom shrugged, "Umbridge will get them if anything is serious."

"But she won't tell us what they're doing." I protested. I so badly wanted to follow them and learn what required such secrecy. 

"Leave it be." He pulled on my hand. I followed, but it never left my mind. We wandered into Three Broomstick together, sitting and ordering our drinks. At some point, someone recognized me and pointed me out. They whole bar cheered for me to preform for them. I had a few times, and I was really good at it. Eventually, Tom did convince me to go up on the makeshift stage. 

"What's your name?" The bartender asked, "Your drag name if you couldn't tell."

"Fantasia." I answered. I wasn't sure how much I liked my name yet. I may change it, but for now I was Fantasia and I was going to own it. 

"Any song requests?" I shook my head. I ended up with Shake it Off, and I even managed to get Tom to get up with me. He rolled his eyes when I started pulling him up, but he joined in. 

I went and sat back down, after bowing for the crowd. I heard two other students talking. 

"Did you hear that Harry fancies Cho?" One asked. 

"Didn't he date her ex? Isn't that a bit trashy?" The other sounded amazed. 

"I know. And after two boyfriend's I thought he was gay." The first said. My jaw dropped. I hadn't heard about Potter ever even being in a relationship. 

"Didn't he almost shag Wood?"

"I heard he did."

"When he was 13?" The second one muttered. 

"I can't believe it. I thought he was supposed to be a golden boy." The first insulted him, "You know, I bet it's because of that family he lives with. They probably don't give him a lot of freedom so he's making up for it by doing drugs and having sex."

"I haven't heard anything about drugs." The second exclaimed. 

"Really? It's all the Hufflepuffs talk about." The first casually stated. 

That's when I stopped paying attention. How much was true? Was really getting high and banging all the guy's in school? But then there was Cho. Was he just finding anything that moved and going for that? Or was he truly attracted to her? It all made my head spin. I'd talk to him about it in science on Monday. 

~*~

Tom and I walked back to our dorm room late at night. I had taken off all my makeup and my clothes. Now in pyjamas and climbing into bed. I had just crawled under the blankets when a warm body slipped in with me. 

"Tom, it's late. We'll get caught." I whispered as he bit my neck, "And you know I don't like being listened to."

"Then let's go somewhere we can't be heard." Tom locked my ear, "I know of a very nice little closet that we could have some fun in."

"Maybe tomorrow."

"But we haven't done anything in ages." He whined, "And watching you walk around in a skirt always makes me so horny."

"Tom, I promise tomorrow." I rolled over to my other side. He tilted my face up and kissed me. He swung one leg over to straddle me, still keeping my face pressed to his. He sucked my collarbone, my fatal weakness. 

"Come on, please?" He begged. I quickly nodded and we hurried into an empty storage closet to rapidly do whatever we could to have some kind of pleasure before Filch came and walked in on us.

After we rested, breathing heavily, we gathered our things and went to bed with a kiss on the lips. Maybe when we get older we can buy our own house and take it slow and easy for once. I loved the rapid feverish moments Tom made when he was needy, but I craved the gentle touches and quiet whispers. 

I wonder if Potter really did have sex when he was 13, and where. Did he get caught? I really shouldn't be thinking things like that, but I was. I thought I heard someone say it was Wood. Did he lose it to Oliver? Was that even the right Wood? The Gryffindor Goalkeeper who got way to into the games. He was fairly pretty. Not a bad choice on Harry's part actually. 

Eventually I managed to fall asleep. On Monday I'd talk to him.


	3. Learning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we begin, I would like to announce that I have a Figment account now that has actual stuff on it. I just published the first chapter of my original story called Glowing. Please check it out, that would mean so much to me. 
> 
> http://m.figment.com/books/964732-Glowing
> 
> Another note, I couldn't find Draco's schedule anywhere, so he's taking Harry's classes.

Class was halfway over and I hadn't talked to Harry yet. It was driving me crazy not to know what was true of what those kids were talking about. Snape had given us a worksheet and we could use out partners. What better time than this?

"Hey, I heard some rumors that seemed fairly outrageous. I figured I'd confront you about it instead of believing them and spending it." I started. That seemed okay, it sounded like I was doing a good deed. 

"Like what?" He asked, scribbling something down on his paper. 

"The least ridiculous in my opinion was the fact that you fancied Cho." I decided to work my way up. His face heated up, "That's definitely true."

"Please don't tell her." He begged. 

"Not a soul." I promised, "But I also heard that you were gay." 

"Well, I'm actually pansexual." He corrected, "It means I'm attracted to anyone, regardless of gender. I'm much more interested in specific traits of a person."

"Thank you for clearing that up for me." I smiled at him, "So what about Oliver Wood?" 

"He was my first boyfriend." Harry answered, "I know people think we had sex, but we didn't. And yes I was with Cedric for a bit."

"My next two questions." I laughed, "Anyway, what about, like drugs? You aren't using them are you?" 

"No. I have before, I'll admit, but not now." He wrote something on the paper, "I don't plan on starting up again anytime soon."

"That's good. You shouldn't get into them. They do things with your head." I told him. 

"Now I get to ask you some things." He looked up at me. I shrugged, "Are you a drag queen?"

"Yes. I dress up any chance I get." I rolled the pencil between my fingers. 

"And I have another question."

"Ask away."

"Are you with Tom Riddle still?" He asked. He hadn't stopped talking about it since Cedric died.

"I am. And we're very happy together and he's not a murderer." I folded my arms across my chest. 

"But he's the reason my boyfriend's dead. He kidnapped us and then he stabbed him." Harry defended himself, "I'm not crazy. I know what happened. He traced over my scar with Cedric's blood. He didn't even wash his hands before he cut off Peter's hand."

"Harry that's enough!" I scolded. He bolted upright, his eyes were filling with tears. He continued to work in his weird robotic stage, "We all know you just want attention. There are better ways to go about it than accusing 16 year olds of murder."

"But I'm not." I could have sworn I heard him whisper, "Why doesn't anyone believe me?" 

I rolled my eyes and continued working. How could he possibly stoop so low. It was the fame he'd had since he was a baby. His family probably treats him like a God, and he's gotten a big head about it. 

"Mr. Malfoy, what have you done to your lab partner?" Snape asked calmly. 

"Nothing. He only swore that Tom killed Cedric Diggers last year. He also said he cut off someone's hand, apparently named Peter." I stated, "You don't go around and say that about people."

"Mr. Potter." Snape coldly turned to face him, "These accusations of your's are beginning to get tiresome. Please cease the lies."

He nodded. He kept whispering to himself, "I don't understand why no one will listen to me. I haven't been wrong before."

"If you're so upset, why don't you talk to your aunt and uncle. I'm sure they would be ecstatic that their Golden Boy fought the Dark Lord's son." I suggested, turning back to my worksheet. 

"I wish." He muttered to himself. What the hell did that mean? 

Sadly I couldn't ask about it because the bell rang and he hurried out of the class to Psychology, which I also had with him. We did always sit on opposite sides of the room from each other. Professor Trelawney didn't like the energy we gave off when we were together. She was an odd sort of woman. She was one of those people that was really into "alternative medicine". That basically means she thought rocks could cure cancer. 

Dozens of candles filled the room, and she kept a salt lamp on the desk. Apparently it was very beneficial to keep a huge block of salt with a light bulb in it. Somehow her strangeness was endearing. She taught us about the way colors affect our brains. Her classes always made me smile. Harry and Ron sat giggling in the corner. I kept thinking they were going to bend over and give each other kisses, but I was probably just being paranoid. I still kept a careful eye on them just in case of the occasional slip of the lips. 

As Trelawney stumbled around us, I write notes about how the color red entices us to indulge in primitive urges and green represents growth and balance. It was an odd sort of concept. She told us that she was on probation.

Then off to English with the new teacher. Ms. Umbridge, I hope she's a Miss. How could anyone marry her? Harry did not like her at all. He would constantly sass her off for her incompetence even after he got detention for two weeks with her on the first day of lessons. Strangely he started showing up with a bandage on his hand shortly after that.

I'd asked him before what it was for and he just pretended it didn't exist. Finally after English, I finally managed to get back in the dorms. Tom was sitting, surrounded by homework and looking particularly stressed. I walked up behind him, careful not to step on any of his papers, and kissed the top of his head. 

"Hey." He smiled at me. He opened his arms for me, after a year I knew this meant he wanted me to sit with him. I sat on his lap on the floor and his arms instinctively went to my waist. 

"What are you working on?" I asked him. His chin rested on my shoulder. 

"Physics. It's the worst." He pecked a kiss on my neck, "You should do homework too if you have any." 

"Not now, I'll do it later." I promised. I stared at the equations and diagrams he had on all the papers. It felt like a foreign language to me. I'd never really looked at his notes before. He was a doodler.

In all the margins of his notebook, he had drawn little animals, or designs, or little comic strips. A couple of times he has written my name in different, experimental lettering. He was like a 12 year old girl. It was a little endearing, I had to admit. 

He seemed to be able to do equations rather quickly, as he'd done half of his physics homework in about 15 minutes. He took breaks between problems to leave precious kisses on my neck and back. 

"I love you." He whispered into my skin. 

"I love you too." I had gotten used to his constant affection. He always wanted to touch me, holding hands, hugs, kisses, anything he could manage. That, or he would shower me in compliments. Sometimes I couldn't tell if I loved him, or the appreciation I lacked elsewhere. He cleaned up his papers and put them in his backpack. 

"Want to go sit on the couch and watch something on the laptop?" He nuzzled his nose in my neck, "I'll let you pick this time."

"Not American Horror Story for once?" I pretended to be shocked. Tom adored anything creepy, I didn't. 

"I'll let you pick anything that isn't an awful reality show." He told me. 

"Even Friends?" I asked. He never let me pick out the show. 

"Even Friends." He smiled and hugged me tighter, "Now I must ask you to please get up. You're welcome to sit with me again once we get on the couch."

I stood up and waited for him to get his laptop issued to sixth years. He opened his arms and I curled back into his chest. He adjusted everything so we were both comfortable and got onto Netflix. He fiddled a little with my uniform jacket before he pulled it off. I relaxed into his arms and he pecked my cheek before playing the episode. 

Whenever anything romantic happened, I could feel a light squeeze at my waist. I couldn't tell if it was purposeful or involuntary. 

"You look comfortable." Pansy said as she walked in. She didn't particularly care for Tom. My guess is that she fancies me and refuses to admit to herself that I'm gay. In fact, she's tried flirting with me on multiple occasions. 

"I am." I buried myself deeper into my boyfriend. 

"Well, I'll leave you two alone then." She turned up her flat little nose and left. 

"Don't worry about her." Another girl I didn't know smiled, "She's just jealous. She told me herself that she wanted you to herself. Although I can see that probably won't be happening anytime soon."

Tom glared at her and kissed the back of my neck. She giggled and followed Pansy out. 

"All the girls want to take you away." He whispered to me, "You're all mine. Why can't they see that?" 

"I'm not going to leave you. Don't worry." I assured him, looking up at his face. He kissed me again. I'm only 15, I shouldn't be in love. Tom was a year above me, yet he should be graduated for as smart as he is. He deserved a lot better than me, but he always stayed. 

He seemed to really, truly adore me. And it felt good to have someone call me lovely and clever. It filled me up with warmth whenever he cradled me and ran his fingers through my hair. 

I couldn't help but wonder if Harry felt this way with Wood. What about Cedric? Did he know what it felt like? I remembered today at lunch when he went to smile at Cho and ended up spitting all over himself. I wonder why he gets all mechanical when he gets scolded. That seemed like a very weird thing. Sometimes he shakes. Was something wrong with him? Should I be careful to watch for things? What if he was depressed? What if he was suicidal? What was I supposed to do? Had he tried killing himself? What stopped him? 

I scolded myself. Who cared what Potter did. It isn't my problem. If he wanted to jump off the roof, well then enthusiasts of the Dark Lord would have one more thing to discuss. 

I turned my attention back to Phoebe and Rachel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I'm aware that this is mostly Tom/Draco, but it will get to Drarry, I promise. I'm planning this out, and it should start around Half-Blood Prince. Yes, these are following the events in the books. The only difference is a Muggle setting. 
> 
> I am also aware that Harry spit on himself in Goblet of Fire, it's happening now because it's adorable and hilarious.


End file.
